Question:
As a wife, how should I advise my husband to pray (especially subuh prayer) and to perform other worship? Are there more effective and specific methods or supplication? I have been continuously advising him as well as offering supplication for him.
Answer:
Alhamdulillah, praise and thanks to Allah for the many countless blessings He has blessed us all with. Blessings and salutations to the Prophet Muhammad PBUH, his wives, his family, companions and all those that follow his teachings to the day of judgement.
You have to continue making supplication for your husband at the same time advise your husband in a good manner and with wisdom. Furthermore, you have to wake your husband every morning for subuh prayer. If he still refuses to pray, then it is no longer your responsibility.
In the book al-Kabir (pg.32) by Imam al-Zahabi, the following hadith is included:
إِنَّ اَوَّلَ مَا يُحَاسَبُ بِهِ الْعَبْدُ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ مِنْ عَمَلِهِ صَلَاتُهُ فَإِنْ صَلٌحَتْ فَقَدْ أَفْلَحَ وَأَنْجَحَ وَإِنْ فَسَدَتْ فَقَدْ خَابَ وَخَسِرَ
“The first of his actions for which a servant of Allah will be held accountable on the Day of Resurrection will be his prayers. If they are in order, then he will have prospered and succeeded: and if they are wanting, then he will have failed and lost.”
Sunan al-Tirmizi (413)
Allah SWT states:
مَا سَلَكَكُمْ فِي سَقَرَ ﴿٤٢﴾ قَالُوا لَمْ نَكُ مِنَ الْمُصَلِّينَ ﴿٤٣﴾ وَلَمْ نَكُ نُطْعِمُ الْمِسْكِينَ ﴿٤٤﴾ وَكُنَّا نَخُوضُ مَعَ الْخَائِضِينَ ﴿٤٥﴾ وَكُنَّا نُكَذِّبُ بِيَوْمِ الدِّينِ ﴿٤٦﴾ حَتَّى أَتَانَا الْيَقِينُ ﴿٤٧﴾ فَمَا تَنْفَعُهُمْ شَفَاعَةُ الشَّافِعِينَ
“[And asking them], "What put you into Saqar?" They will say, "We were not of those who prayed, nor did we used to feed the poor. And we used to enter into vain discourse with those who engaged [in it], And we used to deny the Day of Recompense until there came to us the certainty." So, there will not benefit them the intercession of [any] intercessors.”
Surah al-Muddasir (42-48)
Another way that you could do is gifting books that could explain the rewards of obligatory prayer and sunnah worship, and the threat or warning if he neglects his obligatory worship. Among the book that we recommend is al-Kaba’ir (Great Sins) written by Imam al-Zahabi which now available in Malay.
You can also ask your parents or your in-laws with wisdom to encourage your husband to perform prayer. You can also ask your children to perform congregational together as a form of dakwah for your husband.
Lastly, always make supplication to Allah SWT so that your husband will be blessed with guidance to perform his religious obligations.
Wallahua’lam.